Seeing God the Easy Way: Big Sur 1963
by David Blumenfeld
Nate wanted to see God.
We all do I suppose...wouldn’t it be nice to be directly in touch with
the source of all of this...what? wondrous Being? colossal chaos? have a chance
to ask Questions get Answers experience Ecstatic Visions come Clean be Punished
relieve Guilt start Over in PARADISE but how DO you see GOD? Nate said I don’t
have time to sit at the feet of a guru for twenty years meditate endlessly in a cave I’m taking a
shortcut to heaven just a drop or two of LSD and you’re there fly with me man
to BIG SUR on my BIG HARLEY 80+ miles an hour down Highway One hair blowing
in the California wind sea salt in your face just 90 miles to reach heaven and see The BIG GUY
I’m taking a notebook to record every f’n word S/HE says the Berkeley chicks will go wild to
hear me read it in my grassy pad so hop right on we’re ESALENBOUND I know you
chickenshit hopeless skeptic who pooh-poohs it all doesn’t believe a word scared to try more
than a little hash you can look on be a witness to the BIG STUFF take the wonderful sulfur baths
while I wander out into the forest to commune with the FOUNT OF ALL EXISTENCE
and off we went I can still see the confident look on Nate’s happy face as he dropped the acid on
to his tongue between his slick black mustache and goatee and headed out into the Redwoods
notebook firmly in hand as I luxuriated in the warm sulfur water basking in the glorious
California sun happy for an hour...until...a worried attendant asked if I was with the goatee guy
with the Harley found slamming his head against the wall of his cabin to knock himself out ---
BAD TRIP --- VERY BAD TRIP --- NOT GOD...NO! --- WOLVES SHARKS DEMONS
ANGST SICKNESS UNTO DEATH DREAD LOATHING OBLIVION there isn’t an
easy way to see God shaky Nate said as he rocked uneasily in his chair in the Esalen cabin after
the antidote they gave him set in I’ve learned RESPECT FOR THE DRUG, RESPECT FOR
THE DRUG, Nate kept intoning chanting keening as we headed back up Highway One
this time much more slowly this time with his chickenshit skeptic friend
at the wheel.
David Blumenfeld is a former philosophy professor who resumed writing stories and poems after a more than 40-year break. Since 2022, he has been nominated twice for a Pushcart Prize, one of his pieces received a “notable essay” mention in The Best American Essays 2023, another was in The Best American Haiku, 2023, and 10 of his works were finalists or received other high praise in literary magazines.
