Havening with Affirmations
by Wai-Chin Matsuoka
To say that we are experiencing an overload of information and stimuli may seem to be an understatement these days. So finding new ways to nurture and soothe our nervous system is always on my radar. I’ve been inspired by the Havening Technique and the essential human need to receive attunement and validation — the experience of being seen, heard and understood. Out of that inspiration, I created 7 movements with affirming words for each movement. These soothing touches on our skin also stimulate the release of oxytocin, the “feel-good” hormones through the process.
Before we begin, let’s take a moment to scan our body and notice how your body is feeling in regard to your well-being or anxiety level. Just notice without judgment.
Now, let’s begin with this practice.
1st movement over the forehead with “I am KNOWN.”
We’ll rub our hands together and notice the warmth and energy created in that movement. The first movement is to soothe our forehead from the center to the temple and repeat the phrase “I am known.” We will repeat this movement three times.
2nd movement over the eyes with “I am SEEN.”
We’ll rub our hands together and notice the warmth and energy created in that movement. The second movement is to soothe over our eyes and repeat the phrase “I am seen.” We will repeat this movement three times.
3rd movement over the ears with “I am HEARD.”
We’ll rub our hands together and notice the warmth and energy created in that movement. The third movement is to soothe from the cheeks to our ears and repeat the phrase “I am heard.” We will repeat this movement three times.
4th movement over the ears with “I have a VOICE.”
We’ll rub our hands together and notice the warmth and energy created in that movement. The fourth movement is to soothe from below our ears to our throat and repeat the phrase “I have a voice.” We will repeat this movement three times.
5th movement under the chin with “I am HELD.”
We’ll rub our hands together and notice the warmth and energy created in that movement. The fifth movement is to soothe from side of our face to our chins and repeat the phrase “I am held.” We will repeat this movement three times.
6th movement along our arms with “I BELONG.”… We’ll rub our hands together and notice the warmth and energy created in that movement. The sixth movement is to cross our arms to soothe from the upper arm to the lower arm and repeat the phrase “I belong.” We will repeat this movement three times.
Our 7th and last movement across our chest with “I am LOVED.”
We’ll rub our hands together and notice the warmth and energy created in that movement. The seventh movement is to cross our arms across our chest to soothe from the collar bone down the chest and repeat the phrase “I am loved.” We will repeat this movement three times.
Take a moment of stillness and savor what you are having. Then …
Scan your body and notice if your level of well-being is increased or your anxiety level has decreased.
What sensations are you experiencing in your body?
What images or memories surface during your practice of havening with affirmations?
What emotions are stirred up when you repeat the affirmations?
What thoughts do you have during this experience?
I like to use this practice at retreats as an anchoring practice communally in the evening before we dismiss for the night. And ask everyone to practice it in the morning when they awake. You can practice this first thing after you get up in the morning and in the evening similarly as a grounding practice. Or when you need some reassurance to yourself during the day.
Wai-Chin Matsuoka is adjunct faculty at Christos Center for Spiritual Formation’s Tending the Holy, and served on staff and as coordinator of the Chicago satellite program and as a facilitator for Alumni Development. She is also a trained supervisor for spiritual directors and a facilitator of her Soul-Tending Retreats. With more than two decades of experience in facilitating others into healing encounters with God the Divine Physician, Wai-Chin helps others “doula” new life from the ashes of trauma, change, and transition. Wai-Chin is credentialed as an Ensoulment Coach to guide others to live from the fullness of their souls, a certified InterPlay leader, and a Focused Energy Balance Index (FEBI) coach. These somatic streams add a holistic dimension to her spiritual companionship that is mind-body-heart-spirit focused.
